Is Being Vegan a Dating Deal Breaker?

I recently read a post by Gena Hamshaw of Choosing Raw where she talks about someone who gave up being vegan because of her boyfriend.

That got me thinking. Is being a wannabe vegan a dating deal breaker?

Unless you have met through an online service where the person already knows you about your lifestyle, you have a couple of choices when communicating this information; tell them right away or wait until later in the relationship (assuming all goes well).

I have tried both and I found that waiting worked better for me.

When I brought it up right away, it became more of a debate and judgment crept into the conversation. I think this was because we didn’t know each very well. This made it easier to see it as a distinct difference that was insurmountable instead of an opportunity for both of us to learn more about the other person.

When I revealed it later in a relationship, I treated it as just another detail about who I am, and it was much more natural. It was a nice conversation with questions and answers based on sincere curiosity. Again, I think this was because of the level of understanding we already had with each other.

So, instead of it being a roadblock, it was a chance for me to more fully explore my beliefs and for them to learn about a lifestyle they weren’t really sure about but were open to discovering.

This gave us both the opportunity to see the ‘big picture’ of the other person’s ideals without one issue being so overriding that it became a deal breaker for either.

What has been your experience when dating a vegan / nonvegan? I would love to hear your suggestions /comments on the blog, on Facebook or on Twitter.


How Can You Be Dynamically Harmless?

In my last post, I committed to sharing some ideas on how, as a wannabe vegan, you can by dynamically harmless based on the ideal of ahimsa.

Over the last month, I evaluated what I was doing and tried to discover ways we can all be more dynamic in our veganism so that I could share them with you. To say it was difficult is an understatement.

I realized that when I was presented with an opportunity to be outspoken or ‘plant a seed’ of new thought, I normally stayed quiet unless I was with a person I knew well and trusted would be open to my opinion.

This really surprised me. How can I be so steadfast in my belief and yet so timid and quiet?

I think it stems from the negative impressions people already have about plant-based diets and some of the people who follow them. There are some very outspoken, opinionated and downright mean people out there that are vegan.

Because of their aggressive and judgmental approach, I definitely do not want to be associated with them. In my opinion, they are promoting their own ego-driven agenda instead of coming from a place of being sincerely interested in people discovering what is right for them; vegan or not.

So, after a bit of soul searching, I knew there had to be a middle ground that works for me and others as well, so here are my suggestions on how we can all be dynamically harmless:

  1. Continue to learn so that you can be a source of accurate information
  2. Listen and respond from a place of respect and compassion
  3. Take positive action when it feels right

How are you dynamically harmless? I would love to hear your suggestions /comments on the blog, on Facebook or on Twitter.